scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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