This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
