ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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