It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
