Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
