I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
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