ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
