its not stalking. its research.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Randomize
