On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
its liver damage thursday
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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