Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
They should really pass out barf bags in church
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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