My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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