Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
