YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
