i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
