Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
