I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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