come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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