You can't motorboat a personality
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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