uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
