I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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