My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
