My balls are so social today.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
