I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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