So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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