Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
