i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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