I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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