omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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