I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
