If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
