bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize