How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
