East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
im drinking this country out of the recession.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
