I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
