so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
How external is "for external use only"?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
