I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
