Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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