fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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