Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
A bitchslap is in order.
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