I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
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