Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
