I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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