Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
