My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
