last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
