i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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