it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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