well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
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