Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
