Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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